Just before the presidential election, the NY Times did their regular Sunday Magazine “Talk” interview this time with Senator Joe Lieberman. Who knew the venerable lawyer and senior U.S. Senator was that funny? The best part, though, was the joke he told at the end:
There’s an old guy on the park bench, crying. Finally a jogger stops, sees the guy sobbing. “What’s wrong?”
“My wife of 48 years died, and I was very lonely. I went on a JDate and met a younger Russian woman. We liked each other. So she’s moved in with me, and she’s wonderful. She’s attractive, she cooks well, and she takes care of me and almost every night we have fabulous sex.”
So the jogger says, “Well, that’s a wonderful story. Why are you crying?” The old guy says, “I’m crying because I can’t remember where I live.”
Just as funny was Joe’s parting rimshot, “It will get funnier as you get older.”
Humor aside, 8 days from now while some will huddle round crooning Kumbaya to await another cosmic doomsday — a.k.a. the Mayan Apocalypse, others will instead hang out to await the dawn of a New Age of Aquarius marinating, as Dave Barry once said, in an atmosphere “one part oxygen, four parts nitrogen and 17 parts doobie vapor.”
The last highly publicized end times were predicted by 91-year old Harold Camping and that last “Judgment Day” went the way of all the others. The globe’s still turning. Birds are yet chirping. The Rolling Stones are still playing. And even Pastor Harold is still around as are most of the rest of us.
As for December 21st, then, NASA says there’s nothing to worry about. Indeed, we should keep the economic optimism going even if there’s a ‘fiscal cliff’ coming.
After all, like the guy who complains to his bank, “Waddaya mean, I’m overdrawn. I can’t be overdrawn — I still have more checks,” the good news is that there’ll be 4 more shopping days left after the 21st, including Christmas for all the gift-giving procrastinators.
As for myself, even as the Christmas card makers trundle along to the business boneyard, I’ve done my share. All my cards have been sent. Most of my shopping is done.
And the only crack of doom I’m likely to hear on the Friday before Christmas will be my golf game.
Photo Credits: “Joe Lieberman, official photo,” United States Congress image in the public domain, Wikipedia Commons; “East side of stela C, Quirigua with mythical creation date in 13 (or 0) baktun, 0 katun, 0 tun, 0 uinal, 0 kin, 4 Ahau and 8 Cumku and corresponds to August 11, 3114 BCE in the Gregorian calendar,” Cyrus Thomas (1904) Mayan calendar Systems II, via Wikipedia Commons, public domain;