It’s been a few years since I last made reference to bacon. And that’s despite my knowing full well that a lot of people think bacon ought to go with just about everything, perhaps even “The Irreverent Lawyer.” Sir Francis Bacon, after all, was a lawyer. I can hardly aspire to better. “Judges must be aware of hard constructions and strained inferences, for there is no worse torture than the torture of laws,“ Bacon famously opined.
But intentional puns aside, have you ever tried a bacon sundae? Or a bacon mint?
My last porkbelly post.
In 2011 when I last made a rasher reference, it was about how prosecutorial bacon was saved in the U.S. Supreme Court case of Thompson v Connick. My post this time, though, is scarcely as indignantly infuriating.
So rather than rant again about the prevalent prosecutorial flouting of the rule in Brady v. Maryland, I’ve instead chosen to post about bacon and how medical science has supposedly found beneficial uses for the artery-clogging comestible. We’re now told there are purportedly “3 ways to use bacon as medical treatment.”
According to scientific literature, bacon’s high salt content induces swelling and blood vessel constriction so that it promotes clotting, ergo, it’s good to stop nosebleeds as a nasal tampon made out of bacon. And then there’s the use of bacon fat as bait to entice dermis-damaging infectious larvae to the skin surface for facile, quick tweezer removal. The larvae are left behind by a particularly nasty insect. And last, there’s the medical use of bacon fat again but this time as an ingredient in a topical itch cream for scabies. (Hat tip to the magazine, Mother Jones at http://www.motherjones.com/blue-marble/2015/01/3-real-medical-conditions-bacon-can-cure )
With apologies to the physicians I hold in the highest esteem, I nevertheless remain skeptical about newfangled claims from our cutting-edge medical practitioners. Take for instance the advice, which I’ve dutifully followed about taking daily low dose aspirin. As it now it turns out, there’s news that 1 in 10 patients have been inappropriately prescribed aspirin.
As a friend recently pointed out to me hearing again my frustrated reflections on how often doctors come up with errant diagnoses, “There’s a reason they’re called practicing physicians” he quipped sardonically.
No matter, though, for those not believing in the wonders of smeared bacon fat salvation. Methinks there’s something to the notion that bacon does go with everything — so why not FREE CLE for equally practicing attorneys? The latest Free CLE roundup follows along with the usual disclaimers about content, continued availability, and acceptance for credit by your jurisdiction.
Metropolitan Corporate Counsel
Date: Thursday, January 29, 2015
MCLE Information: Clifford Law Offices is an accredited Illinois MCLE provider. This program has been approved for 2.00 hours of professional responsibility credit in Illinois.
Date: Thursday, Feb. 19, 2015
Time: 2:30-4:30 p.m.
Miller Law Group
In-House Counsel Webinar Series
January 22, 2015 – 11:00am – 12:00pm
Sexual Harassment in the Workplace: A Legal Update for Lawyers
(1.0 hour of Elimination of Bias MCLE Credit)
Click here to register
Employment Law Update Webinar Series
January 29, 2015 – 10:00am – 11:30am
California’s New Paid Sick Leave Law: An Employer’s Guide
(1.5 hours of HRCI & MCLE Credit)
Click here to register
National Academy of Continuing Legal Education (NACLE)
In association with Frankfurt Kurnit, “free access to a variety of Frankfurt Kurnit courses on topics ranging from legal ethics, to advertising compliance, to employment law – and more”
Registration required (NOTE THIS IS THE NOW CORRECTED LINK). https://www.nacle.com/Register
Barkley Court Reporters
Leveraging Trial Technology in a Visual Society (1 hour)
“This program will prepare litigation departments for trial in the 21st century. From scanned exhibits to 3-D animated videos, our trial tech specialist will explain all the elements of visual trial preparation and presentation. Learn to utilize state-of-the-art technology to convey information visually and maximize communication with jurors.”
(1 Credit – IL, NY nontransitional, CA, NV)
FREE LIVE CLE SEMINAR
The City of Surprise, Arizona
Free seminar on recent employment law and use law cases
Location: The City of Surprise – Public Safety Auditorium, 16000 N. Civic Center Plaza, Surprise, AZ 85374
Date: Wednesday, March 4, 2015, 9:00 a.m. to 11:00 a.m.
This activity is worth 2.0 CLE credits.
Registration is FREE. Contact (623) 222-1157
RSVP by February 4, 2015.
1000 Friends of Florida for monthly webinars on planning, development and growth issues facing Florida
February 11, 2015, Noon to 1:30 p.m.
Victor Dover on Street Design: The Secret to Great Cities and Towns
Cost $10 per participant
March 11, 2015, Noon to 1:30 p.m.
2015 Florida Legislative Update
Cost $10 per participant
Photo Credits: Bacon mints, by Ryan McFarland at Flickr via Creative Commons Attribution license; Denny’s Maple Bacon Sundae at Wikimedia Commons under the Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 2.0 Generic license; Library Visitor, umjanedoan by at Flickr via Creative Commons Attribution license.